The Content Wife

My friends consist of one who is going to live in Europe for a year, one who just got back from living in the Dominican Republic, one with an internship in Japan, one who spent a year in Africa, and one who is going to stay at Disney for the semester.

Meanwhile, I’m lucky if I make it to Target.

My daily adventures are far less extravagant, and include quite a few more dirty diapers than the average 20 year old.

After my carefree friend filled me in on her plans for Japan she asked the seemingly harmless question. “So, what have you been up to?”

I swear, part of my heart breaks every time I hear that question.

I don’t work, I don’t go to school. I stay home raising my son while my husband works full time. In a world of feminists, I’m not doing to swell.

Are all my life adventures over?

Flip the perspective lens. One of my previous mentioned friends came over to the house and sat down, tired from her exciting yet busy schedule, and confessed her envy for my life.

I was floored. She envied me? The young mom with yogurt fingerprints on her jeans who hadn’t been outside in two days?

In her eyes, I was living the dream. I was married to a wonderful man, and I had a beautiful baby boy. At twenty, I lived in a three bedroom house with a workout room in the basement. My days were spent doing laundry, cooking meals, reading books with my son, going for walks, and lifting weights during nap times.

To her, those sticky fingerprints on my jeans were an indicator of a magical life fully lived.

And, in a way, she was right.

I had fallen in love with my husband, and loved my son endlessly. But along the way I had fallen out of love with myself.

I had to remind myself that this was the life that I had always wanted, being the wife who encourages her husband and raises respectful children. It might not sound like much when paired against those traveling the world, but I wouldn’t change a thing.

I’m living freely every day, surrounded by the select few that I love, not shackled by debt or obligation.

So what’s the key to being a content wife? Loving yourself and loving your life. It’s as simple as that.

Find a new hobby that you can do as a family, whether it be golfing or evening walks to the park or meeting together with another couple. Little activities done throughout the week can make the mundane seem much less so.

Take time to encourage your husband and cherish those moments spent reading to your child.  Treasure the small hand prints scattered across your freshly scrubbed windows. Enjoy the smell of a clean kitchen and vacuumed floors. Its a simple life, but it’s marvelous.

It’s that classic american dream, the white, picket fence house filled with the sound of boyish giggles and momma’s singing.

I needed to re-fall in love with myself, and as a result, with my life. My heart longed for the remembrance of the days where I genuinely loved everything about who I am. I didn’t need to be sailing on island waves or hitchhiking through foreign mountains to feel accomplished. I have a beautiful family and a place to call my home.

To love and be loved, that’s all I needed. That’s what I have. And that is what, I pray, I never lose.

 

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2 thoughts on “The Content Wife

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  1. There are seasons to life. Plans and dreams are important but learning to enjoy what we are doing in this season of life adds contentment. Being content doesn’t mean you can’t decide to change a situation, it means being thankful and enjoying what we have now.
    We may think a friends life is more exciting or adventurous and then like you did, find out they wish for something else.
    Being a mom and a wife is an adventure. Enjoy it to the fullest.

    Like

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